Why Self Healing is the Ultimate Form of Self-Love

The Void Within-

For years, I wasn’t truly living—I was just existing. No dreams, no desires, just going with the flow, seeking validation, and understanding from others. A mind filled with noise—self-doubt, comparison, guilt.

Deep down there was a void. A heart that didn’t even know what’s next. A heart that never asks what you want? What do you feel? Mindlessly scrolling and comparing the happy moments of others with my empty life. 

The Moment Everything Changed-

A random self-love video popped up that  I wasn’t searching for. The void in me spoke – What if I chose to love myself, accept myself without any conditions?

That single thought changed everything. From that moment, I decided to understand myself, forgive myself, and accept myself. And that’s how my self healing journey began.

Lost and Searching for Direction-

A single video gave me hope and a reason to live. I started consuming this kind of content – as they say, “you become what you consume.“

The journey was so hard, I didn’t know what to do, where to start, or how to start. This needed a mindset shift, trust, or maybe a mentor to begin. I was someone jobless, no meaningful relationships, no confidence, no hope, no hobbies, nothing. I had zero idea about myself or what I was doing.

I started following the creator religiously to understand those terms- self-love, self-care, self-forgiveness, self-acceptance, self-healing and surrendering to the Almighty. 

I still struggle, but I’m no longer that lost version of me. But now, I wake up with purpose. With passion. With a reason to keep going. This is when I realised healing wasn’t just about feeling better. It was about finding me.

Not overnight. Not in some perfect, aesthetic way. But in small, messy steps—learning, unlearning, falling, getting back up. And somewhere along the way, I found something I never had before- ME.

I didn’t wake up knowing what to do—I started because I was seeking clarity, I wanted to know myself.

The Power of Journaling-

I had no one to share feelings and it felt suffocating. Unsure how to process those emotions. That’s when I picked up an old notebook and started writing—just to get everything out. No filters, no structure, just raw, messy thoughts. And for the first time, I felt lighter. 

The single act of writing became my safe space—a mirror helping me reflect on parts I had ignored for years. Some days, it was just a sentence. Other days, pages of thoughts and realizations over time turned into a habit.

Building My Self-Care Rituals-

Slowly, I started adding other self-care practices—morning walks, mindful breathing, and reading things that inspired me. Not because I had it all figured out, but because I was learning to treat myself with the love I expected from elsewhere. Some days, I still struggle. Some wounds still feel fresh. But now, I have a way to process them instead of pushing them away. 

Healing is a Journey, Not a Destination

Healing isn’t about reaching a final destination. It’s about making the choice, every single day, to show up for yourself.

Even when it’s messy.
Even when it’s hard.
Even when it feels impossible.

Because choosing yourself, over and over again, that’s the most powerful form of self-love and self-healing.

The Transformation-

Healing isn’t about moving on from the past— learn to accept, trust, and love in ways you never had before. It’s about rebuilding a relationship with yourself, one small step at a time.

From Self-Criticism to Self-Acceptance-

I am my own worst critic. Before the world rejects me, I reject myself. I would overthink and treat every mistake as if I committed a crime. Constantly replaying the past in my mind, and feeling like I wasn’t enough. 

Instead of tearing myself down, I started treating myself with kindness. I permitted myself to make mistakes, to feel deeply, and to grow at my own pace. 

Trusting Myself-

For the longest time, I didn’t trust my voice. I would seek validation from others before making any decision, afraid of making the wrong choice. But self-healing taught me to trust my instincts, to listen to my inner wisdom instead of waiting for approval.

The Shift in My Daily Life-

Healing transformed how I approached my daily life. I started prioritizing things that nourished me—whether it was journaling, mindful mornings, or simply taking a deep breath before reacting to situations.

I stopped running on autopilot. I became more intentional about my actions, my words, and even the way I treated myself. My days are filled with moments of presence, gratitude, and self-care.

Stronger, Healthier Relationships-

As I learned to love myself, my relationships naturally changed. I stopped settling for one-sided friendships, and I no longer felt the need to prove my worth to people who didn’t value me. Healing helped me to stop chasing external validations and people who drain my energy. I stopped reacting on autopilot and started enjoying and cherishing my own company.

The Power of Self-Love-

Some days, it’s easy. Other days, it feels impossible. But no matter what, I continue to choose myself, again and again. When you truly love yourself, you don’t just survive—you thrive. 

How to Begin Your Self Healing Journey-

If you’re feeling lost but ready to start healing now, you don’t have to have it all figured out. I didn’t either. Healing isn’t about some grand, life-changing moment—it’s about the small, intentional steps you take every day.

Here are the steps that helped me and can help you too-

1. Practice Self-Awareness – Learning to listen to yourself

For the longest time, I wasn’t even aware of how disconnected I was from myself. The first shift happened when I paused and asked myself questions I had never before-

• What do I want?
• What am I feeling?
• Why am I feeling this?
  

You can start by simply observing your thoughts without judgment. It might feel hard in the beginning, but push yourself for a month, and eventually it will become your habit.

2. Set Small, Kind Intentions – Progress, not perfection

At first, I wanted to change everything overnight—to suddenly be confident, happy, and in control. But healing doesn’t work that way. 

Instead of saying “I’ll never be good enough,” I started telling myself “I am learning and growing.” 

Start by choosing one small act of self-love daily, like saying one kind thing to yourself or doing something just for you, even if it’s as simple as taking a mindful deep breath.

3. Find a Safe Outlet for Emotions – Express, don’t suppress

I spent years bottling up emotions, thinking they don’t matter. But healing happens when you let yourself feel.

When I had no one to talk to, I turned to journaling. Over time, writing became a way to process emotions instead of letting them consume me.

Find what works for you—writing, music, art, movement, or even sitting in silence. The goal is to let your emotions flow instead of suppressing them.

4. Declutter Your Mind – What you consume shapes you

That first self-love video was a wake-up call. I realized I had spent years consuming content that drained me—comparing my life to others online, absorbing negativity without even realizing it.

So, I started curating what I consumed-

• Following creators who inspired me
• Reading books on self-growth
• Unfollowing accounts that made me feel “not enough”

Your environment matters, and what you feed your mind can either fuel your healing or keep you stuck. Switch one negative habit for something positive each day.

5. Create a Self-Care Routine – Show up for yourself

I used to believe self-care was just about face masks and spa days. But true self-care is about choosing yourself, even when no one else does.

For me, that looked like

• Taking morning walks to clear my mind
• Practicing deep breathing instead of panicking over small things
• Consuming things that nourished my soul instead of just scrolling endlessly
  

It doesn’t have to be perfect—just something that reminds you that you deserve care too.

6. Forgive Yourself & Let Go of the Past – Healing isn’t about erasing pain

For years, I carried guilt over my past choices. But healing taught me this- 

You are not your past. You are allowed to evolve.

I often remind myself: “I did the best I could with what I knew at the time.”

Forgiveness doesn’t mean excusing past mistakes—it means making peace with them so they no longer hold you back. Write a forgiveness letter to yourself, release the old narratives.

7. Be Patient & Trust the Process – Healing isn’t linear

Some days, I felt like I was making progress. Other days, I felt like I was back at square one. And that’s okay.

Healing is a series of ups and downs. But every time you choose to show up for yourself, even in the smallest way, you are healing.

The biggest lesson I learned?
➡ You don’t need all the answers to begin with.
➡ You don’t have to feel “ready.”
➡ You just need to take the first step.

So, if you’re waiting for a sign—this is it. 

Start small. Be gentle. And most importantly, keep choosing yourself.

 Because you deserve that love, too. 

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” — Rumi .

Conclusion

Self-healing is not a destination, it’s a continuous journey—a choice you make every day.

It’s messy, it’s imperfect, but it’s yours. By choosing yourself, by practicing self-love and self-compassion, you can begin to rewrite the story you’ve been telling yourself. Every small step forward, every moment of self-awareness, brings you closer to the version of yourself you’ve been searching for all along.

So, are you ready to begin your self-healing journey? 

It doesn’t matter where you’re starting from or how messy it may feel. What matters is that you’re choosing to show up for yourself, every single day. You are worthy of the love, peace, and growth that healing brings.

Take the first step today.
Start by grabbing a pen, journaling your feelings, or simply taking a moment to check in with yourself. Share your thoughts, your wins, your struggles with me—I’m here for this journey.

You deserve to heal. You deserve to love yourself. 

According to an article, Self-love is a powerful act that helps with healing and building resilience. It involves setting boundaries, being kind to yourself, and making time to take care of your well-being.